silent treatment is a danger sign !!

I am now a person "just get over it" etc and is treated quite harshly when this is not at all the way to deal with such people. I myself can attest to how it feels to experience the highest highs of love as well as the lowest of the lows and then to lose it all. This harsh treatment almost always comes from those who have not experienced the same situation and i will seek to advise another but cannot help but to be harsh, is that i should simply stay silent and leave it to those who will show some compassion and patience. (I remind myself before others, inshaa'Allah.)

It’s interesting to me that research has shown that woman and men respond to the silent treatment very differently. Woman who are on the receiving end of the silent treatment seem to try anything in their power to win back their good grace with the ostracize where men…don’t. They just deal with it.

I am grateful that along the way, I have had such wonderful friends outside the family who have given me wisdom and strength and compassion. My arwah mak did teach me how to love, and and be loved, and for that I am very grateful. I am also grateful that my memories of her are coming back, I think my mother should be remembered and that her memory should not be hidden. Know who are my true friends are from the actions, and respect, from people all the little signs too. I always take note of who adds positivity to my life and who leaves me feeling down or upset. Then take action accordingly. It is their issues, i can only control what is within my control.

It is a mental battle to heal and recover from someone who I thought I could hold on and be together for many years. I totally cannot hear what i say about “good love”.

For some people, I don’t think the behaviour is intentionally cruel, am I in denial? Perhaps, I guess it is cruel, as she/he knows she's/he’s doing it, I view it more as inhumane, and heartless. I guess they are all the same words, and I am making excuses! But not necessarily malicious, in the way I’ve read some "abusive" relations can be where they get enjoyment from controlling you. I guess that is what it is, the silence is control isn’t it. Dictating when i can or can’t be allowed to communicate. Treating someone like they don’t exist is however awful, especially when I have been so loving. It’s a really heartless thing to do. I just dont get that behaviour at all. How can anyone do that to someone they loved, or they know loves them. How? the truth is i was the one doing it...its so me now !!!

Anyway, as time goes by , i am always right, I need to recover, rebuild, get back to my old confident self. Babai